Pieces of Innocence
by Penwalla
Summary: The Senshi knew nothing of the mysterious, subtle pull of blue eyes." AU rewrite of first season.
1. Fall Into Your Arms

_Pieces of Innocence_

_Part One: Fall Into Your Arms_

_Word Count: 515_

It is that kind of party. The kind that appears in novels about 'real' teenagers and horror stories of teen pregnancy, the kind that plays such a huge role on TV. It is a wild and crazy party, with drugs and lechery and those sorts of things. Usagi hadn't been aware that such things happened in real life and is dismayed to find that everyone around her is taller, bigger and blocking her way to the exit.

The host of this party is a college student whose little sister is friends with Usagi. Since the parents of this girl were out of town and had not been informed of the party, the little sister had bought invitations for a few friends in exchange for her silence. Usagi had thought she was lucky to be invited. Certainly Naru had been jealous.

Now she wishes she was somewhere else. She's thinking longingly of home now, of homework and that weird cat (who talks) that she found. Granted, the cat keeps telling her to prepare for a mysterious 'destiny' and the homework is difficult. But she is at this party wearing a short skirt and sleeveless top, and she feels exposed and scared.

It's dark and the music is loud, intermingled with sounds she doesn't want to think about. What is she doing here?

Sighing, Usagi moves towards the door, muttering 'excuse me' and 'sorry' at regular intervals. No one listens or takes notice of her.

But in true Usagi style, her foot hits the doorjamb and she crashes into someone, even as she gratefully glimpses the sky and breathes in fresh air.

His eyes are blue, dark like the deep ocean, sucking her in, and she can't help but feel shivers going down her spine.

Something has changed.

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He's not actually sure what he plans on doing now that he's here. He means to find Motoki, and grab him and shake him and explain to him that his girlfriend, Reika, is angry and crying and worried and Motoki needs to calm her down and be prepared to beg because Mamoru is not getting involved in their disputes again. If she hadn't been crying when she showed up, he would have turned her away as it is.

A fear of crying females is ingrained in the male psyche. So Mamoru finds the building, where the party is going on, and hopes Motoki isn't doing anything stupid in there. He is grateful for the first time that he was invited, as no one will question his presence.

Well, maybe they will. Mamoru does not go to these parties. Their purpose is beyond him.

So he goes up to the door and before he can grab the handle it flies opens and a girl falls onto him.

His pulse quickens at the sight of the top of her head, and the buns neatly arranged on either side. She looks up, confused-her eyes are blue, bright and clear as a summer sky, with all the promise of a cloudless day.

He has a premonition. Something is about to change.

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	2. Aftermath of Sin

_Part Two: Aftermath of Sin_

_Word Count: 330_

Every time he turns around he finds another one.

There are long blonde hairs everywhere, tokens of that night and that morning. He can recall with clarity the way he awoke tangled in the strands of hair, the way the silence was awkward and pervasive, the way they made no attempt to fill it.

He can't, however, remember how she got there, or what the hell he was thinking. He wishes he could explain it but the answers do not come, no matter what he does or how hard he concentrates.

So he resigns himself to picking the souvenirs out of the sheets and the carpet, wincing every time he touches one. The seemingly-innocent looking hairs are not unlike their owner; bringing inexplicable and unpleasant change into his life.

The sharp shock, like touching a live wire, only lasts as long he holds the hair, but it's almost enough to make him want to hate her.

Almost.

Not that he'll ever see her again.

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She runs all the way home.

Her skin is tingling-she can't explain it any other way-and no matter what she does she can't erase the fleeting image of his eyes. Ridiculous. Stupid. She has a whole host of problems already; how had she ended up with him? Why had she…why would she…dear God, if her parents ever…she pushes the thoughts away.

First, she must devise a suitable lie. Then, she must forget it ever happened.

It seems a good plan. Doesn't it? Simple. Elegant. Totally unlike her. She arrives at home, goes upstairs and fends off her mother and father and brother and cat. She wears the brooch at the feline's insistence.

She falls into her own bed, trying not to think of anything, but her dreams are full of loud music and drunken college students and badly placed door jambs and the consequences thereof.

She wakes up every morning from that fateful day and realizes an awful truth.

She misses him, and he is a stranger.

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	3. Knot of Destiny

_Part Three: Knot of Destiny_

_Word Count: 275_

Three weeks to the day of the party, she becomes Sailor Moon.

Now she understands why her pet cat can talk. Now she understands the significance of the brooch. If only she could understand the dreams of a night she ought to regret…but her cat cannot explain that any more than she can explain to Usagi the significance of the Princess.

That mask is no disguise at all; she would know those eyes anywhere, will never forget that shade of blue tearing her to pieces. She can only gape as she is swept away in his arms. So this, she thinks, is what it is like-to have a knight in shining armor who rescues you, leaving you hot and cold at the same time, leaving you to grasp for answers you don't have.

The warnings of the talking cat are ignored. Her dreams taste sweeter than ever before.

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Three weeks to the day of the party, he becomes Tuxedo Kamen.

He doesn't understand why he's been chosen for this. He's not sure how the weird dreams of his princess, recently replaced by a spiral of blonde hair and wide eyes, relate. But he knows what those eyes look like when she is smiling-

-and he is starting to admit, secretly, that he doesn't regret her as much as he should.

She doesn't bother with a disguise; even if she did, her hair would give her away. He wants…he wants…something, but he doesn't know what (he doesn't know much of anything, he's beginning to see) so he settles for saving her.

The sound of her voice, grateful and shaking, follows him all the way home.

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**Author's Note: This is an experiment. I was working on a Sailor Cosmos-centric drabble when it occurred to me: why not do an entire story in drabbles? One thing led to another, and Piece of Innocence was born. PoI isn't written in drabbles, but it is written with the least amount of words possible. Because of that, I've left a lot of the story up to the reader's imagination. Whether it adds or detracts from the story's impact…well, I'll leave that up to you to tell me in your reviews.**

**This is also the first story I've completed before posting. There are ten parts, total: nine chapters and an interlude. The chapters will be uploaded, two or three at a time, every few days until completion.**

**Enjoy. **


	4. Fool Me Twice

_Part Four: Fool Me Twice_

_Word Count: 336_

She comes to his apartment late at night, having made a pretext to both parents and friends, her brooch held tightly in one hand just in case.

She pushes her way in when he opens the door and begins to wail, spilling out all she knows, demanding from him answers. When she hears his denial, she crumples.

She doesn't want to fight. She can't find the will to kill, and what good could a girl like her be to a princess? Usagi knows what she is; silly and empty-headed, with good intentions and poor execution. Why Luna has come to her is incomprehensible to her.

So she cries and pours our all her troubles into his arms, ignoring the little voice that screams for her to pull away, the one that sounds like her mother. The other voice, the one that's frantically recalling their first encounter, is egging her on.

She can't remember why or how, but he is kissing her and she forgets about the consequences.

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He wakes to the feel of long, silky blonde hair, caught in his fingers, and wonders what deity he's offended. Or pleased. She is still sleeping, looking content and he wishes he could have prolonged his slumber-now that his brain has reasserted itself it demands he move away as quickly as possible.

Mamoru does not do impulsive things. He thinks before he acts. He makes every effort to control his life so that he doesn't have to ever endure losing anything. And here is this girl-Sailor Moon-whose name he doesn't know and whose hair is holding him captive in his own bed.

And to think he had vowed never to see her again, he thinks, and begins the tedious business of disentangling himself. She never stirs, not even when he pulls, and he can't figure out what to say to her should she awaken.

So he turns and walks out of the room, and makes breakfast instead.

He'll worry about the why and how of it later.

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	5. Present

_Part Five: Present_

_Word Count: 527_

He numbly stares at the door, his mind exhausted. Three tests, two battles, and one Sailor Mercury later, he is too tired to bother with thinking. That it is his birthday goes by unnoticed; it is also the anniversary of his parent's death and the day he lost everything. There are gifts, mostly from females he does not know or care for, stacked on the table. He doesn't plan to open them.

There is a knock on the door and he drags himself to his feet.

She is standing there, a badly wrapped package clutched to her chest, and she looks like she might cry.

"I bought you a present. Because it's your birthday, right? Motoki told me, I mean not on purpose or anything but he was asking me for advice. People are always saying I give good gifts and I like giving presents, and I thought maybe you would want one? Because it's your birthday. Happy birthday. Um…so anyways I didn't' know what to get because we've only known each other for like a month and I buy gifts for people I've known for only days but we've never actually talked about anything so I didn't know what to get you. Um. And I didn't want to just get, like a card, because you, that says 'I like, just not enough to bother with a nice present.' And that sucks, and then there are people who just buy…pens or ties or things like that, and you know if you buy stuff like that then the person knows you don't really care, the gift's not personal…you have to think about and buy someone a present that they'll like and that you thought about so that they'll know you really like them…er…so I couldn't think of anything so I bought you a wish. Um. You know, when you see a shooting star or a rainbow you make a wish, right? Well , I got one of those crystal stars, a…a…a prism. It's a star, and a rainbow all at once, you can make wishes all the time and not have to go and look for…er…I'm so sorry, this is stupid, I'll go-"

"Breathe."

"What?"

"Breathe, Odango, you're turning blue."

There is a silence as he thinks of her speech, and the amount of thought she's apparently put into one gift, one gift for a stranger who by all rights she should avoid, and feels…odd. He's never put this much thought into a present, ever. Hell, he buys people cards.

He takes the package from her, and when he moves from the doorway she sees behind him those other gifts, and realizes how stupid she must look-not knowing that he is thinking the exact opposite.

"You're a weird girl, Odango."

"Oh, I-wait, Odango?"

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The star hangs in the corner of the room, catching the light and painting little rainbows on the white walls. It swings lightly in the breeze when he leaves the windows open, and it is the only thing in his apartment that doesn't scream of a Spartan taste.

Well, that and the blonde sprawled across the sheets, hair loose, eyes closed, smile soft.

He makes one wish: that she might come see him again.

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	6. Double Life

_Part Six: Double Life_

_Word Count: 374_

Naru is covering for Usagi again, and she wishes she knew why.

The girl who shared everything with her is keeping a secret, and it's a big one. It must be-Usagi spends so much time off with whoever, while Naru smiles into the phone and tells her best friend's mother that Usagi is fine and good and yes, she is staying over.

A secret boyfriend seems unlikely-Usagi's not that kind of girl, she can't keep a secret very well anyways, and well…she's Usagi. She's nice and kind and generous, but she's not the kind of girl to get involved in some forbidden romance. But Usagi must be doing something wrong…otherwise why have Naru cover for her all the time?

How is it that she sees Usagi everyday and yet feels as if she is speaking to a bright-eyed stranger?

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Motoki looks at Rei. She is a nice girl, even if her tongue is a little sharp and her smile is a little sad. She's also very pretty.

Her eyes are fixed on a figure in a hideous green blazer sitting four stools down. Mamoru is bent over a textbook as usual; his eyes never leave the page, and he seems to be able to drink his coffee without spilling it despite his not looking at it. Motoki knows that Mamoru is no doubt studying relentlessly for a test he will pass with flying colors. Maybe Mamoru has noticed Rei staring. Maybe he hasn't.

Either way, he's never going to look up at her, and Motoki wishes there was a nice way of telling Rei she has no chance with him. Not because of anything to do with her, but simply because Mamoru is by definition a loner and thoroughly uninterested in a relationship.

Her violet eyes are intense; no doubt she is planning an assault doomed to failure. Her friend, Usagi, fiddles with one of her pigtails and watches her friend. There's something off about her normally constant smile; it's forced today.

"Everything alright?" Motoki asks. She looks up at him, fingers wrapped tightly around her milkshake, and smiles as widely as she can.

"Of course!" She chirps, and tries not to look at him, sitting so far away and so near.

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	7. Interlude: Secret

_Interlude: Secret_

_Word Count: 167_

They meet accidentally in the street and she flushes, dropping her things. He picks them up and hands them to her. They play the parts of strangers so well, almost to well. She doesn't bat an eye when Motoki mentions his name, and even controls the urge to stare when they're in the arcade together.

Rei makes it harder. Rei's affections make her both jealous and sad, because she's not sure where she fits into Mamoru's life. Is she a girlfriend or a girl he happens to sleep with on occasion? She wants to believe that he likes her. Sometimes she can even convince herself that he must.

But theirs is a secret affair, known only to them. So much so that she takes the back entrance when she comes to his apartment, so much so that she dare not mention his name.

Someday, she fantasizes, she'll walk in through the front door, and he'll kiss her in public without worrying about anything. Until then, she'll love him quietly, and submerge all the lingering fears for later.

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	8. Identity Crisis

_Part Seven: Identity Crisis_

_Word Count: 387_

They're in battle again, against some monster that no doubt would like to kill them all, and all she can think off is how much she'd like to sleep. Silly thoughts for a supposed superheroine, but there it is. Sailor Moon, defender of love and justice, punisher or evil, is dead tired and would rather be at home under the covers than in the park in the middle of the night.

The moon is covered by clouds tonight, and for that she is glad; its bright white light, streaming in through the crack in the curtains, always gives her strange dreams. Dreams of men who call her Serenity, dreams of crystal towers crumbling, dreams where she is falling and falling and no one catches her.

The youma continues to try and hit her, but dodging is her one skill; it's not much, as she is so often reminded, but she is grateful for it, as it keeps her alive. At least, until her klutziness catches up with her, at which point she goes flying, ready to be skewered-

-and he swoops down to rescue her, business as usual. She babbles out thanks, reaches for the tiara, throws, kills, and takes advantage of the fact that her fellow Senshi are distracted, burying her face in his shoulder. He's warm, and she wishes she could stay with him, but he's already letting her go.

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Three Senshi sit in a room, a bowl of untouched popcorn in the middle. A cat is sitting on the table as well, a cat with a way of seeming almost human. She speaks, black fur on end.

Suspicion runs rampant. Who is the masked protector?

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In the rain, a schoolgirl, unaware that she is the topic of conversation elsewhere, goes into an apartment complex through the back door. She creeps up to the door, knocking furtively, head ducked. She resembles a drowned cat, she thinks; not cute at all.

The door opens, and she scurries in, letting the door close behind her…peeling off her drenched, transparent uniform top and asking innocently for a towel…

She sneezes, and he complains about the irresponsibility of not carrying an umbrella; they don't realize what's coming. They're too busy trying to understand themselves…

The other Senshi know nothing of the mysterious, subtle pull of blue eyes.

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	9. Pull Back The Curtain

_Part Eight: Pull Back The Curtains_

_Word Count: 418_

Her façade of normalcy falls to pieces.

First Motoki finds her in Mamoru's apartment, her spare key (her prized possession, her proof of belonging) in hand. Then the girls' discover his secret identity, and Usagi can't bear it-bear Rei's expression or Naru's cold eyes or her parent's disappointment and fury.

Backstabber, Sailor Mars hisses. You knew I liked him and you slept with him?

Best friend, huh? Naru snaps. Well, if we're friends, why didn't you tell me you were having an affair with some older guy? You used me!

What were you thinking? Mama asks. Your whole life is ahead of you and you do this?

Slut. Whore. Pregnant. Bitch. Guys stare unashamed as she goes by them in the halls; they flip her skirt and whistle. Girls glare in fear, sure she's out to seduce away their boyfriends; they eye her stomach and hands, unsure. Her own family can only look at her form the corners of their eyes, as if she is something disgusting and alien.

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He's unable to concentrate on his homework for once. Normally he can shut out thoughts of her for a while, but today she is hiding in his apartment from her parents. Today she is curled up beside him after crying herself to sleep, and his mind is occupied by her distress and Motoki's lecturing.

He would have told her to go home. He would have made her do the sensible thing, but she wails that he's the only one who doesn't' hate her, and even thought he is sure that to hate Usagi is downright impossible, he gives in to her pleading and takes her home.

Because he does love her, even if he's done a poor job of showing it. Because she's pushed her way into his life effortlessly, because she's taken away the haunting dreams and replaced them with something tangible, because she's cute when she smiles and heartbreaking when she cries. Usagi is alive, really alive, and it draws him in, as if happiness is contagious.

Mamoru knows that their secret would never have lasted, but he still wishes he could have kept her to himself, without the world getting in the way, for just a little while longer.

He promises himself he'll take care in the future; he knows all too well that she's all wrong for him, that she can do better, and that he's not brave enough to do the right thing for her-not if it means losing her for good.

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	10. Angel Tears

_Part Nine: Angel Tears_

_Word Count: 320_

The fallen bodies of the Moon's kingdom lie all around her as she freezes.

He falls. He dies. Blood soaks his clothes, and then her hands as she tries to revive him. His eyes close, and although her heart breaks and her mind shuts down, the carnage around her continues, and Beryl stands there, laughing, gripping her blade tightly.

The sword sinks deep into her breast-Endymion's sword-and she falls, determined to join him, wherever he is.

Instead, Serenity opens her eyes and finds herself floating a hundred meters above the ground, Endymion's head in her lap. She clutches the pocket watch in one hand, and his hand in the other. The tears come, as her awareness returns: is this the reason for her rebirth? To repeat the tragedies of the past?

"The Silver Imperial Crystal!" Someone screams, and she sees the crystal drop towards the ground. She stops it with a thought, calls it with her mind, and feels the power of the holy stone.

She can't accept this outcome. Not now, not ever again.

She fills him up with her bright white light, until his heartbeat is steady beneath her hand. Serenity is no longer crying; the darkness that plagues the earth cannot touch her or him anymore. The shield of power keeps them safe and holds them together.

For a little while.

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They watch the moon rise together, ignorant of the world. The fears she's held for so long have faded in the face of memory; the wall he's built has crumbled in the wake of her love.

Soon enough they'll have to face the world again. The whispering and the judgments, the pain and the insecurity. The darkness is out there, waiting for them still; the dark queen is no doubt watching and planning even now. Their trials are only beginning.

Their hands fit together just right; come what may, they'll face it side by side.

_Finis_


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